I think “dildo” is a perfectly acceptable insult. Like, I’d call you a dick but you’re not real enough.
Uh…… you mean like this?
wow. let it be known that tumblr legitimately changed my opinion on something today.
I’m sorry but is there an advert about toilet paper in there. They are legitimately trying to sex up toilet paper.
how do i ask a boy out
roses are red
violets are blue
guess what, my bed
has room for two
OH MY GOD NO
twinkle twinkle little star
we can do it in a car
row, row, row your boat
gently down the stream
merrily, merrily, merrily, merrily
i can make you scream
I feel like the last one is verging dangerously into serial killer territory
i’m looking for a romantic way to say i hope you think about me when you masturbate sometimes
In the deepest, calmest hours of the night when you have naught but your own company, I hope my image fills you with bliss.
ed sheeran when did you get a tumblr
Sass is the best way to avoid getting fined
"i’m 10% german, 14% danish, 15% norwegian, 7% …"
In Japan families can summon their house ghost to kill pests for them.